Random Helpful Science Facts

As you may know I have recently graduated with a bachelor's degree in biology with a minor in psychology.  Sweet, right?  Well... the "real world" isn't all it's cracked up to be.  My performance on the GRE's (Graduate Record Examinations... ugh) reached an entirely new level of embarrassing.  I'm sorry that I don't know a billion useless vocabulary words and their equally numerous useless antonyms.  I don't know about you, but I see myself as a pretty smart (perhaps intelligent, even?) girl and I have to admit I will never understand the use of mass standardized tests as a means of measuring intelligence.  This test puts a number to my name.  If my number isn't higher than most other peoples' numbers, then I lose.  Well... let's just say I lost.  Anyway, that whole ramble came about because I am now perusing the internets for a job... or as I like to informally say.. a yob.  A yob is different than a job, in my own personal definition, because a job is just something you do for a little bit of money here and there and you don't really care all that much about it in the long run.  A job really doesn't help you attain any higher goals other than maybe buying that new PS3 game or replacing your makeup collection.  A yob, however, is more on the line of a career but is instead still considered a temporary position because it is more like a stepping stone into a certain career path.  I see a yob as something you need to gain experience to be able to get an actual career.  A yob may also, on occasion, allow you to continue your education while partaking in the yob and the yob may even pay for some of that education. (Gasp!)  Anyway, I want a yob.

Who's hiring?

In my perusal of the internet for sciencey-like yobs and other related sciencey-like things, I stumbled upon (not literally, though I do love that website) my new favorite news site:

Medical News Today!

This is like a science geek GOLDMINE.  How have I never seen this before?  Where has this site been all my life?  I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE BEEN MISSING OUT FOR SO LONG.  Ahem... anyway... as I was reading through some articles at twice the speed of light I made a mental note of some things I would like to bring to your attention.  (This is, of course, only due to the fact that I got tired of looking for yobs and decided to entertain my brain with some hopefully helpful science facts.)

1.  If you sleep 6 hours or less (on average) every night, you have a 50% increased chance of getting colon cancer than people who sleep at least 7 hours a night. (That's without mention of the increased risk of obesity, heart disease, diabetes, and of course.. death.)

2.   If you have serious, treatable, chronic migraines, you should have surgery!  That's right... 90% of patients showed at least a partial pain relief even 5 years after the surgery.  If you're interested, here's the article.

3.  The way your DNA is wound up and tightly compressed into chromosomes in the nuclei of your cells has helped determine a certain chemical signal that triggers some forms of cancer.

4.  On many occasions the first time people know they have heart disease is when it takes their life.  There will soon be a diagnostic bio-nanochip that can be implanted in or near your heart to detect and diagnose early sings of heart disease.

5.  Babies who are diagnosed with spina bifida and have corrective surgery in the womb (yeah! seriously.) have fewer complications than those who have surgery after they are born.  Awesome!  The eight year trial period stopped early because of such positive results.

Good news in the science community.  Now to find that yob...

The Tale of Mr. Red

Please excuse me while I blabber on for the next few minutes about an extremely frustrating experience I had at work.  The names of people and places have been changed and events may or may not be slightly exaggerated.....  :)

I work at a quaint little coffee shop in a quaint little town where the people are super crunchy and have ingrained in their DNA the idea that they are way better than you are.  Deadlines and timeframes created by anyone else do not apply to them, and if you try to explain otherwise you will be subject to a condescending snide monologue that somehow manages to penetrate your inner defenses so deeply that you then realize how inadequate and pointless you actually are, therefore bowing to their every whim waiting on them hand and foot.  This general rule applies to most of the employees, you see, except for me.

Exhibit A:  Mr. Red

Mr. Red is the type of guy to fully abuse and take advantage of the system.  Not just THE system, though.  Any system, anywhere, of anything, forever and ever.  Let me explain that I am a lady of justice and, though I do not have any qualifications other than being able to hold my own in stressful or uncomfortable situations, I will not tolerate anyone who thinks they are better than anyone else in any way, shape, or form.  

On any typical day, Mr. Red shows up at about 6:30 PM yapping away loudly on his "GPS phone," as he likes to call it, and chooses the largest table in the whole place to spread himself out and make it known to all of our other guests that he is a man, and therefore needs such an extreme quantity of territory to continue to be as rude and obnoxious as possible.  Mr. Red orders his "coffee drink" by staring down one of the baristas from across the shop, waving frantically, and motioning one of his hands as if he were holding a mug (though sometimes he just looks like he's shaking his fist at you).  He then makes you bring the drink to him because he refuses to get off his fat ass and if you leave it on the counter it will get cold and the boss will get angry.  This cycle continues until 6:59 PM, one minute before closing, when he rushes to the counter and tries to tell you he only had two "coffee drinks" when really he had three or four.  Since you just washed and sanitized all of the pitchers used for steaming the bovine lactose required in his "coffee drink," he will ask you for another one making sure you have to do all of that work a second time.  Of course we can't forget that he wants his "coffee drink" in a ceramic mug!  Not only that, he wants a NEW CLEAN MUG every time he re-orders the same drink making sure you will have to wash and sanitize all of these mugs after closing because he hoards the used ones on his enormous table.  After he heckles you about the prices and makes it clear that he is a cheap and inconsiderate asshole, getting a tip from Mr. Red is like flipping a coin.  No matter how amazingly fantastical your service is, only Mr. Red decides when Mr. Red will leave a tip.  Even though it is now 7:15 PM and the employees are rushing around the shop trying to clean every single surface or item in the entire place, Mr. Red is still taking up an enormous amount of space and definitely not allowing you to sweep the crumbs under his feet which could be ground up and baked all over again into an entire loaf of bread.  When 7:30 rolls around, Mr. Red has to be asked to leave while he takes another 15 minutes to "shut down and pack up."  Basically, a closing job that normally takes a half hour now turns into an hour... and after a long day of dealing with angry customers and whatever other bullshit you can think of, all you want to do is leave.  

In the mornings, we serve egg sandwiches until 11:00AM.  Most of all, we like to be FINISHED COOKING THE SANDWICHES at 11 sharp.  This means you can order sandwiches pretty much up to 10:55AM and still make the deadline.  Following most opinions on this subject, 11 is a reasonable time to exit the breakfast period and transition into lunch time.  As I said, the people in this town do not live their lives by time limits created by other people, and Mr. Red is no exception.  At 10:58 I decided that no one else would order a sandwich because the place had quieted down significantly from the morning rush.  I placed all of the dishes in the sanitizer and put away all of the various breakfast-making essentials.  At 11:00 I see Mr. Red come barging in yapping on his "GPS phone," as always, and continues as described previously choosing the largest table, etc.  This time, however, he comes up to the counter on his cell phone and tries to order an egg sandwich.  The conversation between Mr. Red and I proceeds as follows:

Mr. Red: "Hey can I get a sausage, egg, and cheese on a portuguese roll with a little mayo? Thanks."

Me: "Ohh I'm sorry, we aren't serving breakfast anymore. It's 11:00."

Mr. Red: "Yeah, but I was here at five of I could've ordered the sandwich then."

Me (confused): "Yeah... but you didn't order the sandwich until now..."

Mr. Red: "If I knew you were gonna cut the deadline early I would've called and ordered it over the phone.  Why do you think I come in this place?  I want that egg sandwich."

Me:  "Yes but you didn't call and order it over the phone.  Do you realize how much extra work you would be making for us?  We already washed all of the breakfast dishes and put everything away.  I'm sorry."

Mr. Red:  "Are you serious?  I had my heart set on that sausage, egg, and cheese.  Let me see if there's anything else I want."

In my head I am definitely chalking one up on my personal victory board.  Too bad it's not over yet... 

I went in the back to continue cleaning when I hear a few obnoxious fake coughing sounds coming from the front.  Grudgingly, I drag myself out there...

Mr. Red:  "You know, I have a GPS phone and it says 11:00 right now.  I don't see why you can't make my sandwich."

Me (getting frustrated):  "Excuse me?  We don't run on GPS-phone time.  We run on coffee shop time.  When we are done with breakfast, we are done with breakfast. I'm sorry!"

Mr. Red:  "Listen I really want this sandwich.  Seriously you guys have your rules but if you were gonna cut the deadline early I would've ordered it earlier. Just make it for me, would ya?!"

Me (gears turning...): "Sir I assure you I did not cut the deadline early, but if you reeeeeally had your heart set on that sandwich, then you know what?  I'd be happy to make it for you."

You should've seen the piercing smile on my face at that moment, but it was okay... I'd show him.

Cardinal Rule #1:  Never fuck with people who handle your food. EVER.

I proceeded to take dirty dishes out of the sink to cook his eggs in.  I burnt his roll to a crisp, spent about five minutes dumping the salt and pepper on his purposely undercooked eggs, slathered more mayo on the sandwich than you would even like to hear about, and made sure the sausage was still frozen when I put it all together.  I then went to help every other customer I could find for about 15 minutes and when I couldn't find anything else to waste my time on, I brought him his sandwich.  Mr. Red proceeded to demand his "coffee drink" and not thank me for going so far out of my way to make and deliver this perfect work of sandwich art.

PS - The time is now 11:30AM.

I most definitely made sure to scald the milk in his drink and put enough espresso in it to wake Sleeping Beauty.  I brought the drink over and he didn't acknowledge me once again. He enjoyed every bite of that sandwich and every last sip of that drink.

About a half an hour later, I noticed Mr. Red had left because his emanating rudeness seemed to reside.  Well... that, and he wasn't sitting at the huge table anymore.  I felt relieved, for the time being.  I started walking through the tables cleaning up garbage left behind when, to my dismay, I saw Mr. Red sitting on the couch.  No, wait... he wasn't sitting... he was SLEEPING.  Better yet, he was SNORING.  I mean chainsaw, rip-roaring full out SNORING on the couch in the middle of a crowded coffee house.  Ohhh no, Mr. Red. Oh no you didn't.

Me (shaking Mr. Red): "Excuse me!! You can't sleep here! You're SNORING!"

Mr. Red (absolutely bewildered):  "Whaa-- huh??  I wasn't snoring!  What are you talking about?"

Me:  "Sir, you were absolutely snoring.  This is not your HOUSE.  You can't sleep here."

Mr. Red:  "I wasn't sleeping!  I just dozed off for a second.  Besides, I'm up now.  I'll just stay here to relax a little longer then I'll go back to my table to work."

He starts wiggling around making himself more comfortable, and proceeds to cross his arms, lean his head back, and close his eyes.

Me:  "SIR. YOU CANNOT SLEEP HERE. PLEASE. LEAVE."

Mr. Red:  "What?  Oh, you were being serious?"

Me:  "GET. OUT. NOW."

Mr. Red:  "Alrighttt alright... fine.  Don't have to flip out."

I raised my eyebrows so high they almost came off my head.  He swallowed hard, darted his eyes around to see if he could save face, and scampered out of the shop so fast you would've thought he saw a sausage, egg and cheese sandwich with mayo roll down the road.

How much do you want to bet he'll be back trying to pull the same shit tomorrow?

The Choice of Happiness

So I've definitely realized that my last post was just a bunch of crap about me whining and complaining and not getting what I want.  How three-year-old of me.  I guess it's fine to vent every once and a while... I mean hey, it makes you feel better, right?  I'll allow that to be my one little annoying post and hopefully there wont be any more that consist of me crying about my financial issues for a few hundred words.

In other news, I do believe I have come to a great realization.  Let me then start from the beginning into what led me to this amazing new mindset.

I have always thought that in order to be happy, you had to be satisfied with certain (if not all) aspects in your life.  Many things in our lives are out of our control, and I always thought we simply cannot change what we can't control.  Naturally, I thought that since we can't change those things we can't control, we would just have to accept it and "get over it."  Ahh... get over it.  Unfortunately, that is one thing I am the worst at doing.  I am horrible at "getting over" things.  I don't know why, I'm assuming it's just part of my personality or perhaps some kind of more serious psychological problem that I am either subconsciously promoting or just consciously unwilling to admit.  Either way, I would never be fully happy about certain things in my life because they were not the way I wanted or not the way I made them.  This is what holds me back and keeps me from realizing my full potential.  I can only assume this affects others in a similar way.  Why should I do my best if it will never be good enough?  Why should I apply for that job if I know I wont get it?  Etc...

Lately I've been doing a lot of self-reflection in trying to understand why I am unhappy a lot of the time.  I've always been a believer in the simple notion that I can do anything if I set my mind to it.  The only problem was... I had forgotten all about that.  Somewhere buried under all of the stress, anxiety, and various sad feelings was this glimmer of hope that had been pushed aside.  I realize now that happiness is a choice.  You always have to look at the good and the bad, but you have to keep your life in perspective.  Just because you can't change something now doesn't mean you can't change it later.  If you have a goal, and you are committed - and I mean you know what it takes to achieve that goal and you are willing to do whatever it takes - then it will happen.  YOU have to make it happen.  No one is going to do it for you.  Being babied your whole life is the worst.  If you want it, go and fucking get it.

...which is exactly what I am going to do.  I will find my motivation, I will use it to the best of my ability.  I will use my knowledge and skills to get where I want to go in life.  It is rough right now, but I will remember that time is the cure for everything.  All you need is patience, perseverance, and time.

Crisis on the Home Front

Howdy.


I'm having some major issues living at home with my parents and my sisters.  Mainly, it's Pam.. the Queen Bitch, I'll call her PQB from now on.  Let's start with the basics here, people.


1.  I am 22 years old
2.  I work at a coffee shop for $8.25 an hour plus a few dollars in tips.
3.  My bills include, but are not limited to:  car insurance, three credit cards, gas, car maintenance, phone bill, etc
4.  I have not received any money at all from my parents other than for birthdays, holidays, etc. since I turned 16.
5.  I have, however, asked for some help and been denied.
6.  My parents just spend a shitload of money on brand new windows for the ENTIRE HOUSE.  That's over 16 windows.  Just so you know, our current windows are just fine.
7.  They also just ordered brand new leather furniture for our living room. Great.
8.  Soon I will be applying to graduate school at anywhere from $50-$150 per application.  I'm supposed to apply to EIGHT SCHOOLS.  That's a lot.
9.  Soon I will also be taking the GRE's, which is also $150 each time you take it.  Don't even talk to me about the subject tests.
10.  You could say I'm a little hard for cash.


Basically, the point I'm trying to make is that my parents won't help me out AT ALL.  Not even with my school application fees or test fees!!  Not to mention that the only way I could go to school is through student loans, and every single student loan I have is in my name and I have to pay it back all by myself... 


Don't forget PQB loves to nickel and dime me for anything and everything.  If there's anything she can get me for, she'll take the money for it.  We're on a family plan for our cell phones but I still pay for my data plan and text messages.  This past month I simply didn't have the money to give her, unless she waited for my paycheck.  She got so angry that she told me she was simply dropping my phone from the plan and starting on July 11th I would have no choice but to find my own service plan.


Right.


According to PQB logic, since I can't afford paying her for my data plan and texts I will obviously have enough money to afford my own plan for a FUCKING IPHONE.  Those shits are $100 a month if you have a plan all by yourself! Makes total sense to me!!  Pretty much she wants to make it my problem instead of hers.  I get it.  But really, you can't afford to let me slip by $30 this month?  Wow, thanks.


Living at home makes me feel sooooo loved.  I hope you can feel the sarcasm oozing out of your screen right there.  I am never good enough for anything.  In my parent's view, I am always doing something wrong, or being accused of doing something wrong.  I wouldn't complain if it weren't true.  Money issues, emotional issues, stress issues.  I can't get away.


I'm sorry this post is dedicated to depressing subjects and venting, but to make matters worse, my best friend, my dog Bailey, passed away about four months ago.  Another fishy situation that I will not be able to talk about for a very long time.  Since then there's really been no reason for me to even set foot in this place besides the fact that it is a roof over my head.  Honestly, I'd rather live out of my car.  I don't do that, though, because I like to take showers. :)


Does anyone want to adopt me? Kthnx <3

FINALS ZOMG

Hell week x2!!


As I journey along these last two weeks of the semester, all I can think about is how I can't wait for it all to be over.  Before that happens I must survive:  a paper on Industrial Melanism, a final draft of my senior research proposal on Eurasian Watermilfoil, a regular Microbiology exam, a ten-minute powerpoint presentation, an essay for Climate Ecology, WRD (Westconn Research Day) presentation on our semester-long project of the identification of soil microbes in Lake Zoar using the 16S rRNA metagenome, a Microbiology final, an Evolutionary Biology final, and a Climate Ecology final.  


College students let me hear what's uppp.


It's funny to think that after I'm finished with my undergrad I just want to continue on to graduate school when I hate doing schoolwork so much.  I guess I just realize how important it is, and that you have to work hard to get where you want to go in life.  Nothing is handed to you on a sliver platter... though some kids are brought up to think that way.  Not me :-)


No matter how much I enjoy the beginning of a new semester, I can't even tell you how much I love when it's over.  What joy a short recess brings in the yearly grind that is college life.  It can be severely difficult to attend school full time while working 30 hours a week and trying to spend time with your somewhat-long-distance boyfriend whenever you have a free second (which is like, never) and of course don't forget about all your other friends... wait, what friends? ;-)  It's sad I barely ever get to see anyone... unless you count the insides of my textbooks. 


I'm just trying to hang on for these last two weeks because even though I'm not graduating I'm having a HUGE party with all of my friends from school, work, high school, and anywhere else I may have picked up a companion.  I can't wait to see everyone!


On that note... wish me luck!

Stress.

Wikipedia definition of Stress: "Stress is a term in psychology and biology, first coined in the 1930s, which has in more recent decades become a commonplace of popular parlance. It refers to the consequence of the failure of an organism – human or animal – to respond appropriately to emotional or physical threats, whether actual or imagined.

Stress symptoms commonly include a state of alarm and adrenaline production, short-term resistance as a coping mechanism, and exhaustion, as well asirritability, muscular tension, inability to concentrate and a variety of physiological reactions such as headache and elevated heart rate."

Right, so... now that I've actually read the definition of stress I see it in a very different light. I used to think that stress meant the pressures of happenings in our everyday, such as "stressing over work" or "money stress." I thought of stress as something that caused me to be uneasy, to lose sleep at night, and to just have an overall uncomfortable feeling. Clearly, I am not "responding appropriately" to the "pressures of happenings in my everyday." So. What does this mean to me, exactly?

Well, I'll tell you.

It means that stress is made up. Who makes it up, you ask? I do. We do. Everyone does. Culture, norms, interactions, media, peers, mentors... the list goes wayyyy on. I don't understand humans, and I'm one of them. Why do we create such intricate and silly ways of doing things? Why do we "stress ourselves out"? We are not running from a hungry lion, trying to stay alive. We are not hunting wild boars or scrounging for berries for food. Yes, we have to worry about money so we can pay the bills and buy food. Why does it always have to be about money? Majority rules, and it's the way we've been doing things for a very long time. Does it work? In some cases, yes. In most others, no. Money and possessions create greed. Greed is what fuels politics. So fun. Not really. I hate politics. Anyway, I digress.  Does it matter how much money we have in our lifetimes? Why does any of what we are doing as the human species matter? Honestly, not a single one of us can say that we know for sure. I don't care what you believe, because that is just it - a belief. It is NOT a fact. Everyone has a right to their own opinion. They do NOT have a right to their own facts. You can't pick and choose what facts you want to use while ignoring other crucial ones when trying to state your case. It would be the same thing as me saying that all bananas are yellow, and then showing you multiple pictures of only yellow bananas, clearly avoiding showing you pictures of green or red bananas. Silly example, I know, but say the key to taking a huge step forward in creating a better world for each other involved knowing the truth - that there actually were green and red bananas out there. If, for your whole entire life, all you knew were yellow bananas, and then one day all of a sudden you stumbled upon a green banana for the first time, you'd be mystified. Of course, most people already know the extent of banana colorings. Stay with me here, it's just an example.

Many powerful politicians (>.<) would love for you to believe that global warming isn't happening. Well guess what, folks. It is happening. And quick. People say... "Oh, we had such a cold winter! There's no way global warming exists!" Heyyy reality check!! IT'S CALLED CLIMATE CHANGE, MORONS. I wish whatever scientist that coined the term - "global warming" - didn't. Yes, the earth is warming, but mainly it means we are going to be seeing more and more extremes of temperature and other climate forces.

Let me try to put it for you simply.

The earth can only hold so much carbon in certain areas. For example, under the crust of the earth there are (or was) massive amounts of carbon in the form of - you guessed it! - oil. Petroleum. Natural gas. Coal. You get the point. Anyway, it's all underground, right? Well, it was. And since we've been using it, more and more carbon is being transferred from under the ground, out of our way, to into the atmosphere and water where we live and breathe. The atmosphere and water on our planet can also only hold so much carbon. There is a thing called the carbon cycle, and though it can get pretty complicated, the main points you should know include the fact that it normally deals with the carbon that is already found in nature - a.k.a. not all the waste we are pumping into the thing from using it for fuel. The more carbon pumped into the carbon cycle, the more bad things happen for us. The atmosphere warms, gas levels change, things fall out of equilibrium. This is bad news because of the simple fact that it is happening WAY TOO FAST. If this was happening over thousands or millions of years - hey, no problem! We'd all have time to evolve. As it stands, evolution has not exactly been able to catch up to us to clean up our mess. Evolution takes time. This is something we do not have.

Just chew on that one for a bit.

We're doomed, and there's plenty for all.

"Why must it feel so wrong when I try and do right?"  Thank you KiD CuDi for that.  Mr. Solo Dolo himself.
I don't understand conservatives.  I get that you should defend what you think is right, but why do I see it proven, day after day, that these people are so close-minded and blinded by their tunnel vision?  Stubbornness.  I hate it.  The Human Condition.  See that's just the thing... it sounds like the name of an illness, doesn't it?  Like someone asks you, "What's wrong?" and you answer, "Oh I just have the Human Condition."  Seriously it could be an excuse for all of our problems.  We've created a world we are not capable of sustaining and maintaining in a healthy way.  I hate the media, and many aspects of the American mindset.  Yes, America has a mindset.  They've got their mind set on consumerism and gluttony.  We are all guilty.  I just really don't want to be a part of it anymore.  Honestly I could go on all day on a rant about this.. but really I have a LOT of work I should be doing (and of course I'm procrastinating... do you see a trend?)

Why is America SO completely and utterly obsessed with violence?  It's the main topic on the news; it is becoming more prominent in our everyday lives.  It also has taken over the video game industry.  This bothers me terribly.  I was having a conversation with someone about violence in video games.  I merely stated that I didn't like it, and I didn't understand why so many people were obsessed with games like "Modern Warfare" and "Call of Duty," etc.  He told me he liked it because it wasn't real violence, and that it was "fun, fake violence."  What the hell?  FUN violence?  I feel like that should be an oxymoron. I get that people like to play video games because it takes you away from your everyday life for a while. So does alcohol, heroin, cocaine... I could go on.  Why do we create our lives to be so stressful or monotonous or bad that everyone feels the need to check out for a while?  Who do you know that does not participate in any kind of activity that distracts them from their everyday life?  I can't think of a single person.  Even TV distracts you from your problems.  What a positive feedback, huh?

Anyway... time to start my outline about my Candlewood Lake Milfoil senior research project, and then study for an evolutionary biology exam.  So fun. Not really. Bye.